I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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