My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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