well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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