I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
