Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
