$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
