well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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