Kiss
Puke
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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