i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
