Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
