I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Michael Bay diarrhea
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We have started to decorate penises.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Randomize
