No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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