Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
