Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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