wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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