he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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