don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
