So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
