Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
