So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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