I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
