We need to start having sex underwater more often.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Houston, we have a blender
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
