I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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