I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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