I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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