i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
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