i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
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