so that wasnt chicken after all
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
