brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
