id be glad to
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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