sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
