There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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