I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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