Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize