Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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