turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
