he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
