...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
