Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
