My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
