and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
that's an acceptable place to lick
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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