Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
