i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
