I'm gonna have a badass scar
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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