at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
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