i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i drank out of a bidet.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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