There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
