For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
