she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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