Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
